#alpha!church andy

[correctrvbquotes]

Cut to Church looking down at Andy

Church: Andy, what in the hell happened to Tucker in this little adventure you guys took?

Andy: How should I know?

Caboose: He ate all my food and just threw it up. Coulda just thrown it on the floor, 'n' cut out the middle man.

Church: Yeah, plus now he's moody as hell. I went to ask him if he's feelin' better and he practically bit my goddamn head off.

Caboose: I bet he just would have thrown up your head later. And then you could just put it right back on, it'd be fine.

Andy: He was fine on the trip, maybe he's allergic to you. I know I get nauseous when I look at ya.

Church: Did you guys come in contact with anything weird, like any strange plants or animals er, like superflu viruses er, porn stars?

Andy: Oh yeah, there's one thing I forgot to mention. We invaded a secret biological warfare lab, run by porn stars. Tucker licked all the petri dishes, even though we told him not to. Then he got thirsty, so he drank everything in the test tubes. You think that had anything to do with it?

Caboose: I'm pretty sure that didn't actually happen. I would have remembered that part.

Andy: Aw come on, you're surprised he's sick? I've never seen the guy wash his hands, not once! One time I saw him pick his nose at the pay phone.

Church: I'm just worried, man, who knows if this stuff is contagious? For all we know Caboose could be next. Wake up tomorrow morning he's throwin' up, runnin' a huge fever, next thing you know he's bleeding out of his eyes 'cause his internal organs are liquifying. And I'm gonna be the one that has to hold his hand while he screams himself to death. That's not gonna be any fun.

Caboose: I'm gonna go take a vitamin.

Church: Oh don't bother, it's too late for you anyway. We need to start thinking about me.

Andy: Tell ya what. Send me in, and I'll run clean-up. Don't worry about it, I'll take care of everything.

Church: Andy, I am not letting you blow up the base.

Andy: Comon, just a little explosion! Five, ten megatons tops. Aya all your scary germs will be gone. Nothin' left but the cockroaches! Germ free cockroaches.

Caboose: But then Tucker will be dead too.

Andy: See? It's the perfect plan!

Church: No, but that does give me a good idea. Technically, you can't get sick. So why don't we send you in there to take care of Tucker, you can figure out what's wrong and report back to us.

Andy: I ain't no nurse. I go in there, all you're gonna get, is an explosion. You want a medical diagnosis, go see a doctor.

Church: What did you just say?

Andy: I said you don't need me. Ya need a doctor.

Caboose: Please don't do it.

[ashen-sky]

Personal highlights from...

Red vs Blue The Ultimate Fan Guide

In honor of s19 and the continuation of where s13 left off, here are some highlights from the ultimate fan guide published back in 2015. I've been re-watching the show and it made me want to flip back through the guide. (Everything is sort of in the order it appears in the book, with a few exceptions)

Delta appears as a guide of sorts with fun facts

Caboose's position is listed as "Team Rookie/Occasional Captain/ Church's Best Friend" (it is actually struck out in the book)

He is also the only one listed with the title Captain, appearing as "Private/Captain Michael J. Caboose" (due to Wash "promoting" him, in the canyon on chorus)

Tucker is "Private First Class", Church, Donut, and Simmons are "Private"s, Sarge is listed as a "Colonel" under rank (the other Red's and Blue's ranks appears with their name while his is under "position"), and Grif is "Minor Junior Private, Negative First Class"

Wash used to be a chronic bed wetter (thanks D)

There's also a six page transcript of his psych eval prior to PF where we find out he injured a commanding officer because he wanted to "send everyone to their deaths", he also put a former bully through a mirror in fifth-grade

Grif is stated to have been assigned to Blood Gulch because he was the only survivor of an alien attack on a colony during the great war, he fell asleep at his post and everyone assumed he was KIA

Donut's position is listed as "On all fours... cleaning Red bade"

Doc's profile is "Doc/ O'Malley" and the whole thing lists both their interests, i.e "Position: Canyon Medic, Galactic Overlord"

Andy's (the bomb) name is "Andrew D. Kaboom"

Sheila and Filss share a page

Tex's notable attributes are "Kicking ass (and nuts), being a mean lady, and resurrection"

The password to unlock the file on Beta that CT left behind was "Allison" (Thanks again D)

York's page comments "Several reports were filed against Agent York claiming he and Agent Carolina had something of a "personal" relationship [...] Freelancer Command was unable to find any proof to support these accusations."

One of his notable attributes is "watching his right side" and his position is "team scoundrel"

Eta and iota (Carolina's AIs) were "fear and happiness"

According to the official time line, Carolina was around 6 when Allison died (Allison died 23 years before Blood Gulch and Carolina was born 29 years before)

Wyoming's real name is Reginald

South Dakota's Status is listed as "Extra Crispy"

Smith once spent two days contemplating in silence what Caboose meant when he said his favorite color was "Happy"

Dr. Grey's position is "(Mad) Doctor", she was considered a prodigy at age 11 when she diagnosed every patient in House M.D. within five minutes of their introduction, and she thinks Grey's Anatomy is "far too trite"

Felix and Locus' names are listed as Unknown in the book, but I do believe their names were revealed in a s14 episode

The counselor advised the director to tell Tex that Alpha was in Blood Gulch to protect him and stop her from investigating the project

Notable Features of Blood Gulch include "Avoid Tucker's Rock at all costs, as it has not been properly sterilized"

BTS from D: The opening shot of Season 6 was created by shooting players moving in different quadrants and combining the shots"

Important events at High Ground, "Washington killed Agent south in cold blood- with a much less cold flamethrower."

Fact from D: "Once a year, Reds and Blues stationed at Rat's Nest still pay tribute to Agent Alabama by sending a flaming mongoose soaring through the night sky."

Donut likes to spend his leisure time in Federal Army Outpost 37, in the jail cells in handcuffs

The statistics pages, 9 pages of stats from number of robots murdered (112) to Church's sniper rifle accuracy (9.3%)

Bow Chicka Bow Wow was first said in season 4, and Simmons never sucked up in season 12, season one had the most "son of a bitch"s at 14 Donut made 32 accidental innuendos, and the odd number of pedals in vehicles was called out on five occasions Tucker has the highest kill count of all reds and blues (counting wash and Tex), at 24 followed by donut at 22 and Tex at 21, Caboose is the lowest at 2 raised by Lopez and 3 and Church at 8 Sarge has threatened/wished death on Grif 56 times, and Donut has nearly died five times Seasons 2 and 9 had the lowest kill counts Carolina had the highest flash back kills at 68 in season ten, and the twins are tied at 23 kills in season nine

Tex's attack to free Alpha was 2 years before Blood Gulch, the great war ended 1 year after Alpha arrived in Blood Gulch and after the Wyoming incident in Blood Gulch (where they tried to kidnap junior), Chorus takes place 5 years after Alpha initially arrived in Blood Gulch

The mission books has adorable illustrations (they look like Caboose's guides from s14)

There's a mindmap for all the Leonard and Allison iterations and they they connect

Sarge has a guide on how to build a robot, scented lube is preferred, along with mad scientist goggles, a cup of baking soda, and seventeen tablespoons of sugar

More silly plans with fun diagrams

Donut's diary, D tells us that Donut washes his underwear on tuesday's

Caboose's Wisdom section on: feelings, relationships, army etiquette (including gems like crayons don't work as bullets. Use markers.), life, and the reds and blues

Simmons made a text based adventure games

BTS from D, the story of Simmons refusing to go to the Vegas Quadrant is a reference to Gus Sorola (Simmons' VA) refusing to go to Las Vegas with the rest of the rvb creators

You can find the case against Sergeant Grif from the reds at rat's Nest (he was selling red team's ammo to Caboose before he was locked up in the brig, Private Jones wore a wire tap to help the red's catch Grif's under the table dealings)

Leonard met Allison in the mess hall during basic training where he pissed off another recruit and Allison had to save his ass (Church was right, Carolina get's her temper from her mom)

I'm Church. private Church. Leonard. Leonard Church." the only thing I cared about in that moment was that she knew my name. She smiled. Her smile could light up solar systems. "Kind of a funny name. Church." "It's Jewish."

I spent the rest of basic chasing after her. In some ways, I never stopped.

Here's hoping non of our beloved idiots die in season 19! I mean, I know Church will be gone, but the others... they deserve a happy ending.

Also I miss the freelancers and AI...

[rocketboots564]

I decided to write more of my first time reactions and thoughts to rvb Season 9!

This should (hopefully) be the third and final part for season 9.

Season 9 part 3:

Imagine showing up to your funeral, and they don’t even give you a respectable eulogy… They just talk shit about how you talked a lot…

Yeah I would kill all of them… Simmons is 10 times the man I’ll ever be.

Oh so Maine straight up stole the grenade launcher! Kinda like he did with AI units… history is a full circle once again

You know… I feel like the director should’ve given them equipment just in case the sarcophagus thing was heavy. Which it is. The Director is a really bad boss

Understatement of the century I know

Washington I’m 80% sure half the things you freelancers do is improvise… and honestly I’d be sick of it too

Oh yeah Carolina let’s just fucking kick out friends off of a SEVERAL STORIES TALL BUILDING. You’re lucky you have that armor.

The freelancers do heists the same way I played Payday 2: Five minutes of stealth before going “nah fuck this” and blasting the brains of some poor shmuck all over the walls

I think you SHOULD feel bad for the people down there, you tossed MAINE at them Carolina.

You chose to use the flamethrower… inside a building… no wonder the freelancers kick your guy’s asses on the reg… yall are fucking idiots

DONT YOU DISRESPECT THAT GUN IT SAVED OUR ASS IN REACH. Bouncy gun is fun

“That bit with the purple plane? That was just showing off,” well when your number one in Freelancer ranked mode you might as well act like it Wash

You know Carolina kinda acts like Tex a bit. No wonder they’re at odds. There’s only room for one dommy mommy bisexual badass in this show

Oh it’s not a bomb… it’s worse… it’s a big ass fucking lazer

AHSBBFMSM THE JPEG EXPLOSION is KILING ME

Yeah Carolina I bet it is karma… deserved Karma

NOT THE XYLOPHONE!

CAROLINA HITTING THE FUCKING Sonic Adventure 2 CITY ESCAPE “talk about low budget flights. No food or movies? I’m outta here!” ON THE SARCOPHAGUS

I’m surprised Project Freelancer wasn’t investigated and shut down earlier with how much property damage and civilians they endanger.

Tex being responsible about the about the team is a nice change of pace–oh she was paid…. makes sense.

Simmons can play the Banjo? When’s his new single dropping?

Grif be supportive of your Brofriend (Bro + Boyfriend = Brofriend)

Wow… imagine your best friend being closer with your ex/not-ex girlfriend than you.

Couldn’t be me Church… mainly cause I’m gay and don’t have a girlfriend

Sarge, the planet is quite literally breaking apart, and your plan is to blow it up… honestly I’m not even surprised.

It’s actually astounding how absolutely this heist went to shit… and quickly too.

“We had to learn to care for our equipment” Tex says. Cut to five minutes ago where she drove a motorcycle through a glass wall.

HOLY SHIT MAINE CAN TAKE SOME DAMAGE! I mean I know they’re wearing Spartan armor and all, but JEEZE.

I love how even the freelancers almost (emphasis on almost) fumble their stuff like the red and blue teams.

Like when Carolina juggles the briefcase in the air before getting a hold of it, and then immediately getting kicked back.

Damn… more Carolina and Tex beef.

How much do I wanna bet Grif’s plan is gonna backfire hilariously?

Yes it backfired horribly… because now Andy exists… again

Oh hey Delta was born! Great! Which means Alpha/Church was just tortured to the point that his mind split…. Not great…

“We’re the good guys? Right?” Oh… you’re concerned you’re not? What clued you in, the insane property damage, murder, or endangered civilians?

“I forget you…” AAAHHH WHAT THE FUCK THAT IS SO SAD YET SO GOOD.

And they brought him back… that’s actually really fucking funny.

THEYRE GONNA KILL THE DIRECTOR?! AWWW YES THIS MOTHERFUCKER HAS IT COMING.

Conclusion: YES I CANT WAIT TO WATCH SEASON 10

[rvb-relationship-royale]

RVB Relationship Royale, Tournament 2- Friendship Fray

I'm alive, folks! I've finally finished rounding up all the ships, filling out the extra spaces in the bracket, and randomly generating the first round of matchups. As we have a total of 64 matches in round one, I plan to make it easy on myself and post 8 polls each Saturday and Sunday, starting this weekend.

With all that said, the matchups are listed below the cut!

Delta & Theta vs. Andersmith & Caboose

Doc & Wash vs Lopez & O'Malley

Wash & Simmons vs. Red Team

Donut & Wash vs. Carolina & Simmons

Tucker & Wash vs. 479er & Wash

Tex & York & North vs. Grif & Simmons & Donut

Tex & York vs. York & Illinois

Tucker & Junior vs. Grif & Bitters

Caboose & Loco vs. North & Carolina

Doc & O'Malley vs. Wash & Dr. Grey

Wyoming & Florida vs. Simmons & Caboose

Grif & Sarge vs. Doc & Donut & O'Malley

Doc & Lopez vs. Freckles & Caboose

Doyle & Dr. Grey vs. Carolina & Locus

Kai & Tucker vs. Gamma & Wyoming

Doc & Meta vs. Bitters & Matthews

Jax & Sarge vs. Epsilon & Carolina

Florida & V.I.C. vs. Locus & Siris

Church & Donut vs. York & Delta

Grif & Carolina vs. Donut & Tucker

Alpha & Wash vs. Kimball & Tucker

Andy & Crunchbite vs. Carolina & 479er

Grif & Locus vs. Kimball & Felix

Carolina & Donut vs. Delta & Alpha

Doc & Grif vs. Sarge & Lopez

Simmons & Lopez vs. Maine & Carolina

North & South vs. Church & Simmons

C.T. & Wash vs. V.I.C. & Red Zealot

Sarge & Wash vs. South & C.T.

Church & Tucker vs. Donut & Lopez

Simmons & Donut vs. Sarge & Caboose

Wyoming & Maine vs. Kai & Tex

Caboose & Andy vs. Kai & Doc

Caboose & Donut vs. Tex & Sheila

Locus & Sirius & Felix vs. Wash & Caboose & Tucker

FILSS & Carolina vs. Donut & Sarge

Tex & Donut vs. Grif & Tucker

York & Wash vs. Sarge & Surge

Murphy & Jenkins vs. Church & Sheila

Locus & Felix vs. Kai & Simmons

The Lieutenants vs. Lopez & Lopez 2.0

North & York vs. Church & Caboose

Church & Jimmy vs. Doc & Simmons

Caboose & Wash vs. Alpha & the Fragment AI

Wash & York & North vs. Blue Team

Grif & Church (Alpha) vs. Doc & Donut

Kai & Carolina vs. Tex & North

Jax & Dylan vs. Dr. Grey & Kimball

Tex & Caboose vs. Lopez & Sheila

Kai & Caboose vs. Temple & Doc

Kai & Donut vs. Doc & Junior

Carolina & Kimball vs. Caboose & Sheila

Carolina & Wash & Tucker vs. Lopez & Locus

Caboose & Lopez vs. Carolina & Wash

C.T. & Wash & Ohio & Idaho & Iowa vs. Sherry & Derryl & Terrill

Wash & South vs. Donut & Cronut

Rogers & Cunningham vs. Red Team & Blue Team & Doc

Sarge & Dr. Grey vs. Ohio & Idaho & Iowa

Lopez & Grif vs. Caboose & Delta

Sarge & Carolina vs. Maine & Wash

Grif & Kai vs. Tex & Sarge

Kimball & Doyle vs. Grif & Huggins

Gamma & O'Malley vs. North & Theta

Tex & Tucker vs. Tucker & Caboose

[jade-kyo]

RvB 20th rewatch: s9

This isn’t one of my favorite seasons but alas I still have a good time with it

Church dramatically monologuing to himself and restarting when he gets interrupted is so real bro just like me fr

NORTH AND SOUTH!!!!!

Honestly I know this is quite literally the point but the leaderboard is INSANE like you’re fighting a war and trying to come up with any means to win and you take your god damn super soldiers and make them fight each other for approval. Absolutely DERANGED.

CAROLINA!!!!! MY BABYGIRL!!!!

Also love how she’s introduced as camouflaged and in black armor to parallel Tex

“Sorry about the mess fellas” I LOVE HER I LOVER HER I LOVE HER SO FUCKING MUCH SHES SO SILLY LET HER BE SILLY!!!!!

Man the game has these little flashy lights on the armor and once you notice it it’s so distracting lol

NORTH YOU BADASS!!!!!!! AND THE FACE REVEAL ALSHKAHSKDHKSJSK

G o d this music is so good

GOD THE LEADERBOARD IS DERANGED

Man Carolina cares about her team- she immediately offers to talk to South…

So the freelancers are just the reverse of the reds and blues. They start out as allies and friends and slowly become enemies and backstab each other all in the name of becoming the best

Meanwhile the reds and blues start out as enemies and try to kill each other regularly and end up coming together over time both because they genuinely come to care about each and because they’re losers who need each other to survive cause they’re not capable of doing so on their own

CT!!!!!!

CT really was the only one smart enough to see through the leaderboard bullshit

OMG TUCKER TEACHING ABOUT GIRLS AKHSKAJS THIS IS ONE OF MY FAVORITE BITS IN THE SHOW ITS SO FUNNY

I think Caboose is the only person here that actually gets bitches

“I have been preparing for this role my whole life”

Feminist Caboose

“I think the working class should uprise against the rich people” Church you are a treasure

GOD THIS ENTIRE BIT HAS SO MANY GOOD MOMENTS

Wait…. Is Grif yellow?? It may just be the lighting or something but he looks really yellow this season… IS GRIF YELLOW BECAUSE CHURCH REMEMBERS HIM WRONG OMG AKSHKAHSKDJ

Tucker really the one to call out Church for constantly bringing Tex back and how absolutely wild that is

TEX!!!!!!! GOD SHES SO PERFECT AND HOT AND SEXY

Carolina cares so much I’m gonna vomit

I wonder what drunk Caboose would be like

Not even a minute and Chex already has the divorced vibes

The andersmith bit is also one of my favorites

AND THE COW BIT

Alpha…auogagahh

“Andersmith, I kept my promise… you have been avenged…” Caboose you are a treasure

Yorkalina you will always be famous to me

“Probably the sound of you being an idiot” // “oh yeah… dick biscuit” quoted line

JINKIES ITS SHARKFACE

“Shut up counselor” that was a very Church moment…

FALLIIIING TOWAAAARDS THE SKYYYYY

Wash is so silly

Tex is so fucking sexy

CAROLINA IS SO FREAKING PRETTY ALSHLAHSLSHKD

ANDY!!!!!

“Yeah I know how to lift jackass I’ve been carrying this entire team since I got here”

DELTA!!!!!

Agony

I am in agony

Chex my beloved

“I forget you”

Kill me

Church fr better than me I would not be able to let go of a hottie like Tex

CABOOSE IS GOD

I do wonder how if Church knew that it was a rescue and not the end of the world if he would’ve made a different decision

“You’ve given me everything, I would do anything for you” agony

CAROLINA AND CHURCH MY BELOVED

I enjoyed this season way more than I remember enjoying it in the past- but now onto season 10… god I love season 10

[andvys]

omg im back!! this is super long so im sorry for taking up your whole inbox but if you can't already tell im a huge fan of dwoht!! honey anon ❤️

He watches you for a moment, eyes tracing the spots that aren’t hidden by the covers. His fingers itch as he stares at your soft skin. He notices the scar on your shoulder, the one that a bat left, the one that you ripped off of him, saving him from a wound it would have left on his abdomen if you hadn’t saved him – you took the scar that was meant for him. 

waittt that's so romantic 🤭

All that you do is turn around in your sleep, holding onto the sheets as you stay deeply asleep. 

oh she's me

What will you think when you wake up to an empty bed? 

knowing Andy it will probably be a prelude to angst, Steve... should've known it by now 😁

He puts on a pair of gray sweatpants and a black shirt, taking his time styling his hair while his mind is still all over the place. He puts on his favorite cologne, hoping that it will drive you crazy just the way your perfume drives him crazy. 

gray sweatpants?? pics or didn't happen

“You are not a stray, but you are a cat, girl,” Argyle says to you as he steps inside, patting Steve on the shoulder, “always got her claws out, right man?” 

i fucking love Argyle 😭 hongyle or argoney is our ship name now

“Maybe you’re the one who doesn’t know how to fuck.” You murmur, narrowing your eyes at him.

oooh that hurt him

He brings his hand forward, letting go of your head so he can cup your cheek, before you can even finish your sentence or react to his touch, he leans forward and smashes his lips against yours, finally kissing you with his eyes closed and his body now pressed against yours. 

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

He could just slip inside of you with ease, you’re wet enough to take him but he still wants to stretch you open with his fingers first. 

oh okay ! good for them.... good for them.... 😭

“Like hell that was a one time thing,” he mumbles against your lips as he grabs your waist with both hands and picks you up without a struggle. 

YAAAAAY TELL HER

“Y-You came inside of me…” You mumble, dropping your arms to your sides. 

NOT THEM BEING SO IRRESPONSIBLE 😭😭

“I’m not on the pill, Steve!” You frown at him, pushing him away from you so you can brush past him. 

GIRL BYE HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAVA

He didn’t put much thought into how awkward it would be to ask for a Plan B, but the moment he asked the old lady behind the counter, and she looked at him disapprovingly, he suddenly wished for the ground to swallow him WHOLE

NOT THE OLD LADY TOO AHAHAHAHA THIS IS SENDING ME

“You should go to church and pray, boy.”

GOODBYE 😭😭

“Well, we fucked.” 

this is so funny to me because of the chaos and awkwardness 😭 imagine fucking you lifelong nemesis almost getting pregnant with him 😭

“Well, there isn’t,” he shrugs, “I see whoever I want and you do… the same.” He almost chokes on his own words. 

NO STEVE THAT’S NOT HOW YOU GET THE GIRL!!

How many girls have occupied this space before? 

:(( poor blondie

You shut out your negative thoughts, letting your curiosity in. You tiptoe across his room and stop in front of his bookshelf – that’s filled with more comics and movies than books. A polaroid camera sitting on the shelf, next to a fake plant. Of course, he got himself a fake plant. 

not his ugly ass grandpa straight man alpha room 😭

He cracks a smile at your words, eyes flashing with amusement, “didn’t know Eddie was my girlfriend.” 

BAHAHAHA BUT HE IS

Neither of you called. 

nooooo 😭

You could’ve called too, he even told you to, but for some reason, you thought that it was just another way to tease you, you heard the mocking tone in his voice, you saw the smirk he looked at you with. 

no girly don't let him use you !!!

“...Chandler…”

CHANDLER??? 😭😭😭😭 OF ALL NAMES FUCKING CHANDLER IM CRYING

But your eyes nearly bulge out of your skull and you almost choke on the sip you just took when Eddie’s eyes grow comically wide as he takes a look at Steve’s back. Your best friend’s jaw drops before a gasp falls from his lips. 

GOODBYE THIS WHOLE THING IS SO AMUSING TO ME 😭😭 i can see the drink squirting out of eddie's nose

“I know we haven’t talked much, but um… I was wondering– cause… I love Robin, seriously but– okay um…” she stutters, closing her eyes for a moment as she shakes her head before she opens her eyes again and looks back up, “I was gonna ask if you would like to go shopping with me?” 

OMG YES

Suddenly, Steve lunges forward, using the hand that just hid his eye to grab yours, he opens both eyes and greets you with a smirk before he pulls you into the water. 

omg they're cute when they're not idiots 😭

“I’m just saying, I’m not even speaking out of experience, dude,” Argyle slurs, holding his hands up in surrender, “I think you can’t have sex with just one person and be happy with it – how can you even know what’s good when you’ve only been with one person!?” 

thats literally such a man thing to say. we're OVER argyle

With a sigh, you lean back in your chair, and look at your best friend, “fine… eight.” 

GIRL EIGHT?? EIGHT WHERE?? SPILL

And, Steve… Oh, Steve is really not having the best time tonight. He knows exactly who you mean, Jacob Leeney. 

he sounds like a douchebag

No matter how fast his lips move against yours, he isn’t the one in control today, and he knows it, he can feel it… and to his surprise, he doesn’t mind it. 

YEAH you know your place boy

But just as he’s about to break the kiss to start begging for you to touch him, you roughly pull away and take a step back from him, leaving him without the warmth you just provided him with. 

SHOW HIM GIRL SHOW HIM

“You’re basically the older version of Max,” he grins, “you’re both stubborn and act all cold even though you’re the biggest softies at heart.” 

AAA that's so cute i love max

Jennifer Mitchell stands in front of Steve in all her glory, clad in a short sundress, her boobs are nearly on full display, her dark waves falling down her tanned back as she twirls the front strand around her finger, she glances back at you when the bell above the door goes off, her plump lips are the first thing you look at – god, you can’t even lie to yourself and think that she isn't gorgeous, because she is, you’re not blind. 

JENNIFER GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE

But you aren’t, you aren’t the only one, you aren’t the special one, you aren’t enough for him. 

oh i have an idea! kick steve in the balls 😁

He licks his lips as he eyes the top you’re wearing, low cut and stopping just below your belly button, showing off your cleavage and your soft skin. You replaced your skirt with shorts that are even shorter than what you wore before, but they look much more comfortable, soft and perfect to… sleep in. He can’t wait to rip them off of you and dive his face into your pussy.

OH! OKAY! 😁

“Mmm, can’t remember it that well,” he shrugs, sipping his beer, “so maybe I should refresh my memory a bit.”

shove that beer up his a-

“Did Jennifer do this to you, Steve?” You murmur against his skin as you press another soft kiss to his scar, “or did she just lay there, making you do all the work?” 

SHES SO POSSESSIVE ITS KINDA ICONIC

“Ah,” you nod as a smirk reappears on your lips, “that confirms that no one ever rode you before.”

omg you basically took his virginity 😁

“Steve is gay.” 

BAHAHAHAHAHA SHERLOCK HAS NOTHING ON YOU GIRL!!

Nancy has been nothing but kind and sweet to you, and you can’t help but feel guilt and regret growing inside of you for the way you once felt about her. 

she's actually the cutest ever

“You’re the prettiest girl at this party.” 

jacob is giving where the hell have you been loca

“You plan on fucking him tonight, Blondie?” He sneers, unable to hide the bitterness in his voice. 

GOODBYE i thought it was blondie talking to steve 😭

“New rule then, Blondie,” he mumbles, not stopping with the kisses on your neck, “we leave with each other when we are at the same place. So, meaning today it’s me.” 

ummm... just say you're exclusive you DUMBASS 😭

“Stevie, Stevie, Stevie!” 

AWWW CUTIES (says while ignoring this being screamed during rough sex)

“I know, baby, I know.” 

STOP THIS IS GENUINELY CUTE (and very hot i got butterflies)

“Well, did you think I’d let him steal you away from me…?” He asks, clearing his throat as he adds, “tonight?” 

go hit your head against the wall steve 😁

You turn around when your name is being called again, to find Jacob walking towards you. Oh. 

HAHAHA FUCK YOU JACOB (oh except she didn't 🤭)

“Get out.” He demands, not nicely. 

now blondie should do the thing they do in gta when they pull someone out of the car and steal it

“Would you prefer a wheelchair?” He laughs, not noticing the stunned look on your face, as you open and close your mouth a few times. “I’ll be right back, Blondie,” he shoots you a smile before he opens the door, letting light seep into the room from the bright hallway, he takes another glance at you over his shoulder before he steps out and makes his way into the bathroom. 

THE WHEELCHAIR MADE ME LAUGH OUT LOUD HAHAHA

You are so devastatingly beautiful.

and you're still not making a damn MOVE. men 😫

“Oh wait, you probably don’t want to get it wet again,” Steve mumbles, as he looks around the room, knowing that you left your hair clip here after your shower last night. He finds it on the counter and reaches for it. 

that's what she said

You crane your neck, looking at the plate before him, excitement flashes in your eyes, “I love waffles.”

I LOVE WAFFLES TOO

“I know you do,” he says, smiling. “What do you want with them, berries and syrup?” 

now steve needs to make me waffles too 😞

“Oh my god, Steve.” You hold your hand in front of your mouth after swallowing the first bite, looking at him in awe.

that's what she said

“That’s how you sounded last night,” he wiggles his eyebrows. 

OMG STOP THAT WAS MY JOKE

“You eat your waffles with nutella?” 

i haven't had nutella in years and now im so hungry

The sweetness of the waffle, the chocolate and the freshness of the berry, burst in your mouth, creating the perfect combination. Your eyes widen, and you sit back as you hold your hand in front of your mouth after releasing the fork from your lips. You moan at the taste and take your time savoring the flavors.

reading this at night wasn't the best idea i think . . .

“Last time I checked, I didn’t have a vagina. I think you know that fact pretty well.”  

you have a mental one 😁

“Oh?” You tilt your head, “and where’d you learn how to cook?” 

i read this as "where'd you learn how to cock"

“You’re italian?” 

HE'S ITALIAN LETS GOO!!!! STEVE GO MAKE ME A LASAGNE!!!!!!

“And my cooking skills,” he smiles, nodding. “I’m gonna knock you off your feet, the next time you stay over, I’ll cook you the best pasta you ever had.” 

I WOULD ACTUALLY PROPOSE RIGHT THERE

He stepped into an empty house after fighting against evil. 

this is so heartbreaking nooo 💔💔

He had no one to come home to. 

i can adopt you steve if you make pasta for me

“We don’t have to fuck, Blondie. You can let me eat your pussy though, it’ll help her recover.” 

is this a safe space to admit it's kinda hot when he refers to it as her lmao 😭

You pout as you turn around to face him, looking down at yourself, “wow, this is the real walk of shame.” 

FOR REAL I CAN PICTURE HER LIMPING IN HIS CLOTHES TO HIS CAR 😭

You reach for the seatbelt, buckling it in as you take a deep breath, though instead of exhaling again, you freeze and your eyes widen. The smell of sex still lingers deeply in the car. 

ew you both 😭

“Couldn’t you have taken five minutes to clean up a bit?” 

REMIND THE KIDS AND ROBIN TO NEVER. NEVER! SIT IN THE BACK OF HIS CAR.

“Good, I’m glad,” she nods, “we decided to do a barbecue instead of movie night, so I hope you’re hungry.” 

IM STARVING READING THIS CHAPTER. stevie do you wanna make me a burger

“Yeah, Argyle is attempting to make cocktails.”

i can think of something else involving argyle and coc—

He nods, scoffing slightly as he starts to take it out, letting his hair fall loose around his face, “well you see, I didn’t steal it, rather, I found it. Right–” He pauses as he walks over further into Steve’s room, turning away from the both of you, he slams the scrunchie on the dresser and turns back, the smile now missing, “--Here.”

BUSTEEEEEEEEDDDDDDDD

“Dating?” Steve scoffs, chuckling a little as he crosses his arms over his chest. “Fuck no, it’s just sex.”

FUCK NO? oh im gonna show you fuck no you little bitch

“It’s just sex, Munson,” he says, with an unsure tone in his voice, and a bitter taste on his tongue, that he swallows harshly. “Nothing more.” 

HIT HIM IN THE BALLS

You have no experience with babies at all, you have given her the bottle, you even changed her diaper, but your sister was around, and you didn’t spend the whole day alone with her. 

you're stronger than me girl cause i would not agree 😭

This is surely one of his dreams, he is convinced of it, why else would he wake up beside you, and a baby who looks like you?

NO ESCAPE FROM THIS ONE STEVE. but also imagine if you wake up after having sex with a girl to a sight of her holding a baby that looks like her 😭 i would have a heart attack

You look at him, as you pull your niece closer, holding her up, you press her against your chest, “can you believe that we made a baby overnight?” 

HAHAHA IM SAYINGGG

Prrrrrrrrrrrrrrt

GOOODBYEEEE 😭😭😭😭😭

“Oh fuck,” he mumbles before his eyes widen further at the curse word that just left his lips, “I shouldn’t have said that, shit– I mean, I’m sorry, please forget what I just said,” he rambles, as though she understood a single thing that he said. 

THIS IS SO FUCKING FUNNY I CANNOT SKEJOSBDIS

Realization replaces the look in your eyes – he is entering a baby fever trance, with your niece nonetheless. It makes your smile reappear, that’s how you feel too, every time you get to spend time with her. 

couldn't be me but good for you steve!!

“Just a little bit,” you slur, and raise your hand to show him as you furrow your brows and hold your thumb and pointer finger into an L shape, “so much.” 

GIRL 😭😭 if you do something embarrassing now i SWEAR

“Yeah, I think so too, honey,” he murmurs, the nickname rolling off his tongue easily, almost normal, “you don’t feel sick, do you?” 

HONEY MENTION I HEAR MY NAMEEE 😁

“Billy did,” you shrug. 

OH NOO

Your eyes crinkle as you beam at him, stealing his breath away with simple reactions like these. 

AND IN THE BLINK OF A CRINKLING EYE

Steve Harrington is down bad. 

NOW HE'S DOWN BAD CRYING IN THE GYM

“You’re feeling okay though, right?” He whispers as he slowly brings his hand up to the side of your face and he cups your cheek. 

and then she just vomits on him— im sorry

“But nothing could take me away from you, he’d just have to suck it up,” you whisper as you peck his lips again, shutting down the worries in his head. 

AAAAAAAAAA OKAY IT'S HAPPENING

And then, you finally pull him into a longer kiss. 

THEYRE KISSING THEYRE KISSING SNSJSHEOBEISJSIW

“Can I be with you tonight?”

THEYRE SO CUTE 🥹🥹

“You really think I’m that disgusting?” Steve asks, not bothering to hide the hurt in his voice. 

OOOH DRAMA TIME

“Eat at least half of that.” He commands and you just grumble something, cutely so, underneath your breath as you take a bite. He knew you probably didn’t eat anything at the fair, a possible reason for your drunkenness.

if she doesn't want it i can eat!!

He doesn’t notice that you had turned your head to look at him again, and a wolf whistle is heard in the room, making him turn to look at you. You have a cheeky smile on your face and he feels himself blushing slightly as he laughs, taking his pants off next, leaving him in boxers only. 

LMAOOO SHES SO FUNNY

“Can’t believe I fell for you, Blondie.”

AAA THE FLUFF THIS IS ADORABLE I CANNOT 😭❤️

HIIIIII!!! PLEASE DONT EVER APOLOGIZE FOR THAT? YOU CAN SPAM MY INBOX ALL YOU WANT, YOU'RE WELCOME TO DO THAT ANYTIME ♡ I'm so happy you like this series so much!!!! YOUR REACTIONS HAD ME GIGGLING AND LAUGHING THE WHOLE TIME

THANK YOU FOR THIS REVIEW YOU JUST MADE MY DAY 😭

THE WHERE THE HELL HAVE YOU BEEN LOCA COMMENT MADE ME LAUGH SO HARD LDJAWFAJWLFAJFR

I love how you went from giving yourself and argyle a ship name to saying its over LMAO

No one should ever sit in the backseat again, I agree with you 🤭

and honey, you know this is always a safe space 😌

I love all your comments 😭 THANK YOU AGAIN 🩷 I think you're gonna like the next chapter A LOT 😌

[onceuponatimeinthe70s]

All In The Family

An old church steeple backlit by a low setting sun. It is 1971 and I’m going tell you a story about two God fearing musical families. The first were the children of Mormons George and Olive from Ogden, Utah. The second, offspring of Church of God in Christ followers KC and Alpha from Dallas, Texas. The four eldest boys of the first family sang barbershop harmony and appeared on the Andy…

[donut-entendre]

time for crackship suggestions u say? take ur pick, i am crafting strange and evil ideas just for u. Kai/Doyle. Simmons/Spencer Porkensenson. FLSS/Counselor. Andy/Gary. Sharkface/Siris. Huggins/Lopez. Sarge/Felix. i have unleashed them, do as u will >:3c

Okay Simmons/Spencer and Sarge/Felix sound literally fucking hilarious okay hold on

Okay so Simmons/Spencer. Instead of just letting Simmons just lie there after feinting he rolls him over like "hey you good??" and Simmons is Gay As Shit so when raspy mcdeepvoice is the first thing he sees upon waking being CONCERNED and GENTLE to him he's like oh. OH. HOMOSEXUAL. Simmons is a huge nerd and probably gets more curious abt Spencer after it's hinted by the guy that his armor is alive. Eventually one of them end up with the other's number mmmm somehow. Simmons probably slips his to Spencer. Simmons is major crushing on the dude and coupled with Plain Old Curiosity he's spending just. SO much time talking to Spencer over the phone, and Spencer visits between jobs every once in a while. He also just pops by sometimes and it's 100% just to say hi to Simmons bc holy SHIT someone who's not scared of him and his weird sentient armor!! And wants to talk to him!! And is cute in a pathetic way!!! best time to be gay EVER.

Felix has to power through the urge to just kill Sarge. Sarge is a HUGE sucker for Romeo & Juliet-type situations AND of deranged people trying to kill him so all of Felix's unsubtle attempts on Sarge's life while pretending to play nice not very well just make him like Felix more. Felix is INFURIATED but it's convenient so he thinks, that one of the group's leader figures likes him, bc that's an ADVANTAGE, a way in! He doesn't account for Sarge being a fan of killing. Or stealing. Or wanton murder. Sarge and Felix end up goading each other into a violent spree but it's framed like a romantic date where instead of flower petals in the wind it's. blood splattering on their armor as they go Bonkers w/ some fun weapons. Idk what that catching pose is called where someone swoons and is caught by the other (romantic pose) but Sarge holds Felix like that. Sarge tries to do that at some point but Felix just drops him bc that's HIS thing and Sarge, again, goes oh HELL YEAH this one's fiesty YEEHAW

[abbatoirablaze]

SDAU-Raised By Bears, Chapter 10

Word Count:  726

“And do you, Thor Odinson, take this woman to be your wife, until death do you part?” the priest asked, looking to the alpha in front of him.  Thor smiled, giving his young bride a proud look. 

“I do.”

“If there is any person in this place of holiness that think these two should not join in matrimony, speak now or forever hold your peace!”

“WAIT!” A voice yelled from the back of the church.  Everyone turned to look at the young man standing at its entrance, the doors thrown open wide.  The loud banging from the heavy oaken doors against the churches interior had made quite a few people jump in surprise and gasp.  Andy stood there, basked in the light from outside, “STOP THE WEDDING!”

“And who are you?” the priest scolded, “why have you stopped this union?”

“Andy Barber!” Andy said quickly, stepping into the church, “I’m in love with this woman, and she’s, my mate!  I don’t want her to get married to this bear!”

“A-Andy.”

“Son of a bitch,” Thor growled, the alpha stepping down off the altar.  He started stalking down the aisles, passing the congregation as he made his way to Andy, “who the fuck do you think you are, coming in and ruining my wedding?  Ruining thi-“

“Mate?” an older gentleman asked.  He looked expectantly between her and Thor before turning to Andy. Thor froze in his spot, while Andy’s heart raced, staring at the head of her family, “you’re my daughter’s mate?”

Andy nodded nervously, fighting the words so that they should pass through his lips, “I-I am sir.  And I’m in love with your daughter.  And I refuse to let her marry this jackass.  He doesn’t love her…not like I do.”

“I ought to-“ But Thor was cut off by one of her brothers, who’d stepped out of the aisle and placed himself between Thor and Andy, “What the hell are you doing, Ben?”

Her father turned towards her, “sweetheart, is this bear telling the truth?  Are you his mate?”

She bit her lip, nodding at her father, “h-he rejected me because I’m human.”

 Her father’s jaw tensed as he looked back at Andy.  And suddenly her other brothers stood as Thor pushed her elder brother.

“I was afraid,” he proclaimed loudly to the crowd that had gathered for her wedding, “I -I was afraid Bailey.  I-But I’m more afraid of losing you.  I-I can’t lose you.  I can lose everything else in this world…and that’s fine.  But I won’t lose you.  Y-you’re my mate.”

“Bailey?” her father asked, looking towards her.  He gave her a soft look, and they seemed to have a silent conversation between the two of them.

She looked at Andy, “what’s stopping you from changing your mind the second I call off my wedding, Andy?  What’s stop-“

“I want to mark you!” he proclaimed louder, taking another few steps down the aisle, “I don’t want to run from it anymore.  I want to be with you, more than anything in this world.  I want you to be the mother of my cubs, Bailey.  Last night when I made love to you-“

Thor turned towards his fiancé as the crowd gasped, “you cheated on me?”

“And when your sister came and told me that you still loved me too-“

“Crystal?” she asked, turning towards her older sister who was standing beside her.

“I know what it’s like to leave behind your mate,” she said firmly, shooting a glare to her own husband before looking at her sister, “you deserve better than that, Bailey.  You don’t want to be Bailey Odinson.  You want to be Bailey Barber…”

“Bailey…”

Bailey’s heart ached as she looked at Andy, and she wanted nothing more in the world than to take his hand and run.  She spared a final glance to her elder sister, and then her fiancé, and finally to her father before slipping out of her heels and running past them all. 

She grabbed Andy’s hand and kept running, pulling him out of the church.  The couple stopped at the bottom of the steps and Andy pulled her to him in a passionate kiss. 

“I love you, Andy Barber.”

“I love you, Bailey,” he whispered, cradling her face in his hands, “and I’m going to spend the rest of our lives proving that to you.”

Tag List:  @evanswife1918, @lohnes16, @tenaciousperfectionunknown, @alexalovekeyloki, @eralen

[louiseazy]

Red vs Blue Swear Count Season 9

116 swear in total for season 9

first to swear and last swear was said by Epsilon Church

swears used:

slut once; cunt twice; crap 3 times; dick 6; ass/bitch 11; shit 12; damn 22 & fuck 48

Ranks: (characters with m in front of their name are from the memory unite

last place non-swearer director/counselor/Tex/Carolina/469er/FLISS/Maine/Wyoming/Florida/m Vic/Delta/Caboose/Sarge/Alpha

8th is m Lopez with 1

7th is a tie m Caboose/m Sarge/m Andy with 2

6th is a tie South/CT with 3

5th is a tie m Texas/North/York/Wash/ with 4

4th is a tie m Simmons/insurrections/(songs) with 5

3rd place is a tie m Grif/m Donut & the extras with 7

2nd place is m Tucker with 18

1st place is Epsilon with 33

[correctrvbquotes]

Church: You have got to be kidding me. There is no way I'm gonna let this happen.

Tex: I told you, he can do it.

Andy: Yeah, I'm qualified.

Church: Listen I don't doubt, that he can do it. I doubt that I want him to do it.

Andy: Why?

Church: Well you know what Andy? You're not exactly the most diplomatic of individuals.

Andy: That's bullshit! You're only saying that 'cause you're a racist.

Church: Racist- bombs are not a race!

Andy: Eh, shut up ya dirty Shisno.

Church: We finally make contact with an alien being, and our first attempt at communication is gonna be through a bomb? Am I the only person who has a problem with this?

Andy: Well unless you've got your English to Blarg-blarg dictionary, I don't think you got a choice, now do ya.

Caboose: I had one of those, but I threw it out. It didn't have many pictures.

Tex: I'm sure this'll be fine.

Church: You know I feel that I'm gonna regret this, but I feel even more that I just don't care, and that watching this whole thing unravel might be kinda interesting. Go for it.

Tex: Alright, where's the alien?

Church: Oh shit, I forgot.

Cut to the alien still beating the shit out of the back of Tucker's head

Tucker: (with each strike, as if bored) Ow, ow, ow...

[doubleleoenergy]

🔥 = Smut

MARVEL

Cool for the Summer 🔥 (18+ ONLY) -  parentsbestfriend!Steve Rogers x fem!reader x parentsbestfriend!Natasha Romanoff | The Agency’s Writing Challenge via: @agentofbarnes​

Fire & Desire 🔥 (18+ ONLY) - sub!Sam Wilson x dom!fem!Reader

Jealousy, Jealousy 🔥 (18+ ONLY) - sub!Steve Rogers x dom!fem!Reader | Maneater Writing Challenge via: @navegandoaciegas

My Oh My 🔥 (18+ ONLY) - alpha!Bucky x fem!Reader

Medusa 🔥 (18+ ONLY) - Medusa!Natasha Romanoff x fem!Reader | Greek Mythology Writing Challenge via: @faeryloki

ii. Medusa 🔥 (18+ ONLY) - Medusa!Natasha Romanoff x fem!Reader | Sequal to the one above

So Pretty 🔥 (18+ ONLY) - nomad!Steve Rogers x fem!Reader

The Chain 🔥 (18+ ONLY) - Steve Rogers x Reader | BuckyBlues 4K Writing Challenge via: buckyblues

Whatever You Like 🔥 (18+ ONLY) - sugardaddy!Sam Wilson x latina!fem!Reader

NON-MARVEL

Bad Habits 🔥 (18+ ONLY) | Lee Bodecker x fem!Reader

Daddy Issues 🔥 (18+ ONLY) | Grayson Dolan x fem!Reader

Angels and Demons (18+ ONLY) - Rafe Cameron x fem!Reader

i. Wasted

ii. 23 

iii. Friends

iv. Heaven and Back

v. Angels  

vi. Church

vii. Beauty in Death

viii. Empty

ix. Slow Down

Blue Bayou (18+ ONLY) - Sam Wilson x fem!Reader

i; Blue Bayou

ii; Blue Bayou

iii; Blue Bayou 🔥 (18+ ONLY)

iv; Blue Bayou 🔥 (18+ ONLY)

v; Blue Bayou

vi; Blue Bayou

Lolita (18+ ONLY) - bestfriendsdad!Andy Barber x fem!Reader

i. Summer Bummer

ii. Serial Killer

iii. Cola 🔥 (18+ ONLY)

iv. Lolita 🔥 (18+ ONLY)

v. Off to the Races 🔥 (18+ ONLY)

vi. Burning Desire 🔥 (18+ ONLY)

vii. Sad Girl 🔥 (18+ ONLY)

vii. Video Games

The Princess and The Pogue  (18+ ONLY) - JJ Maybank x fem!Reader

i. Losers  (18+ ONLY)

ii. Dark Times  (18+ ONLY)

iii. Angel  (18+ ONLY)

iv. Wicked Games  (18+ ONLY)

v. Blinding Lights  (18+ ONLY)

vi. I Feel it Coming  🔥 (18+ ONLY)

vii. Heaven or Las Vegas

viii. Die for You

ix. Save Your Tears

[badrvbideas]

red vs blue but andy is the alpha instead of church

[clocks-are-round]

Red vs Blue Spotify playlists

general rvb vibes | rvb vibes

Characters

Main Cast

Caboose | WATER BISON POWERS ACTIVATE!

Carolina | RvB Carolina

Doc & O’Malley | Faith in | Incompetent Fools

Donut | PINK!!

Grif | Don’t Want To

Kai | Love to Feel

Sarge | Shotgun

Simmons | Suck It!

Tucker | Lover | Fighter

Wash | RvB Wash

Smart AI

Alpha | Who Is Running This Army?!?

Beta & Epsilon Tex | Buenos Días, Cockbites

Delta | RvB Delta

Epsilon | Ain’t That a Bitch

Gamma | Programmed to Lie

Omega | Unhappiness

Sigma | RvB Sigma

Theta | RvB Theta

Dumb AI

Andy | RvB Andy

Freckles | RvB Freckles

Lopez | RvB Lopez

Dos.0 |

Sheila | RvB Sheila

VIC | 555-VICK

Freelancer

CT | RvB CT

Flowers | RvB Flowers

South | RvB South

The Director | RvB Director

Wyoming | RvB Wyoming

York | RvB York

Other

Chrovos | RvB Chrovos

Felix | RvB Felix

Genkins | Faces for Butts

Dr Grey | Psychoanalyses for Everyone!

Huggins | RvB Huggins

Locus | RvB Locus

Sharkface | RvB Sharkface

Temple | Frozen

The fragments | RvB Fragments

The Labyrinth | Anxiety Attacks Incarnate

The Meta | RvB Meta

Duo (not all of these are inherently romantic stfu)

Caboose & Church | Best Friend

Caboose & Donut | RvB Pastry Train

Caboose & Wash | RvB Caboosington

Carolina & Tex | #1 Rivalry

Carolina & Wash | RvB Carwash

Carolina & York | Elevator Shaft

Church & Tex | Forget

Doc & Donut | RvB Docnut

Doc & Omega | Doc & Omega

Donut & Wash | Kiss You

Grif & Kai | RvB Grif Sibs

Grif & Simmons | We’re Here

Kai & Huggins | Do You Like Girls?

Kai & Tucker | RvB Sucker

Locus & Donut | RvB Locnut

Locus & Felix | RvB Mercs

Lopez & Sheila | RvB Lola

North & Theta | RvB North & Theta

Omega & Tex | Trouble

Temple & Tucker | RvB Temple & Tucker

Groups/Other

Gary, O’Malley, & Sigma | The “Evil” Ones

—

These playlists are always being added to, and more playlists will eventually be made!

[rvb-relationship-royale]

Victory Summary- Friendship Fray Round One Part One

Alright, gang, I'm pretty late to update as per usual, but it's finally here! As we've moved on to part two of round one, I'm listing the results of part one's polls below. As always, congrats to our winners- and to our losers, remember, you're still beloved in our hearts!

Delta & Theta vs. Andersmith & Caboose: Delta & Theta victory

Doc & Wash vs Lopez & O'Malley: Lopez & O'Malley victory

Wash & Simmons vs. Red Team: Red Team victory

Donut & Wash vs. Carolina & Simmons: Donut & Wash victory

Tucker & Wash vs. 479er & Wash: Tucker & Wash victory

Tex & York & North vs. Grif & Simmons & Donut: Red Privates victory (bow chicka bow wow)

Tex & York vs. York & Illinois: Tex & York victory

Tucker & Junior vs. Grif & Bitters: Tucker family victory

Caboose & Loco vs. North & Carolina: North & Carolina victory

Doc & O'Malley vs. Wash & Dr. Grey: Doc & O'Malley victory

Wyoming & Florida vs. Simmons & Caboose: Simmons & Caboose victory

Grif & Sarge vs. Doc & Donut & O'Malley: Doc & Donut & O'Malley victory

Doc & Lopez vs. Freckles & Caboose: Freckles & Caboose victory

Doyle & Dr. Grey vs. Carolina & Locus: Doyle & Dr. Grey victory

Kai & Tucker vs. Gamma & Wyoming: Kai & Tucker victory

Doc & Meta vs. Bitters & Matthews: Bitters & Matthews victory

Jax & Sarge vs. Epsilon & Carolina: Epsilon & Carolina victory

Florida & V.I.C. vs. Locus & Siris: Locus & Siris victory

Church & Donut vs. York & Delta: York & Delta victory

Grif & Carolina vs. Donut & Tucker: Grif & Carolina victory

Alpha & Wash vs. Kimball & Tucker: Kimball & Tucker victory

Andy & Crunchbite vs. Carolina & 479er: Carolina & 479er victory

Grif & Locus vs. Kimball & Felix: Grif & Locus victory

Carolina & Donut vs. Delta & Alpha: Delta & Alpha victory

Doc & Grif vs. Sarge & Lopez: Sarge and Lopez victory

Simmons & Lopez vs. Maine & Carolina: Maine & Carolina victory

North & South vs. Church & Simmons: Dakota siblings victory

C.T. & Wash vs. V.I.C. & Red Zealot: Vealot loss (r.i.p. for the second time)

Sarge & Wash vs. South & C.T.: Sarge & Wash victory

Church & Tucker vs. Donut & Lopez: Church & Tucker victory

Simmons & Donut vs. Sarge & Caboose: Sarge & Caboose victory

Wyoming & Maine vs. Kai & Tex: Kai & Tex victory

[sharkface-daydreams]

Mobile Tag List: Individuals: BGC

[Mobile Tag List Masterpost]

[No reblogs please. This is a utility post and not meant for circulation; It will only work as intended if it is opened on the blog on the mobile app. :) Thank you!]

How to use this tag list: Find the tagged content you’re looking for in the list, and tap the corresponding tag in the tags of this post. This should open the search function on this blog with the content filtered to that tag.

If problems arise please send me an ask [here]. Please remember that this version of the tag list is not meant for desktop. Find the Desktop Tag List [here]

Individual AI (most of them ended up in Blood Gulch anyway):

Alpha #asshole: the original

Epsilon #asshole: the remix

Yellow Church #asshole: it seemed like such a good idea at the time

Tex/Beta #:ghost in the shell

The other AI are tagged in this syntax: #ai program [Name]

Individual Characters:

Sarge: #the-reddest-red-to-ever-red

Simmons: #anxious-cyborg-noises

Grif: #the-chillmaster

Donut: #pink-and-owning-it

Lopez: #tired-robot-abuelo

Composite/AU/Indeterminate Church: #asshole:-the-original

Tucker: #swish-swish-stab (currently updating older posts from rvb-tucker)

Caboose: #lorge-blue-friend-boy

Sheila: #80-ton-mom-friend

Kaikaina/Sister: #kaikaina-my-beloved

Andy the Bomb: #the-stealthiest-archer

Doc: #forget-me-lots

O'Malley (not the Omega AI,): #the-original-bad-boy